First stop: Hanoi or Han Oi (I learned that Vietnamese only has monosyllabic words). Culture shock was almost instantaneous but I can't say I didn't appreciate the way people went about their lives in this northern city. How to describe it? Easy going but always going? Somehow that sounds right. People just seem to be here. And they seem to be a lot on the sidewalks from eating meals at any time of the day, sleeping, fixing their motorbikes, selling goods, getting haircuts, reading, making things, DRIVING on them...almost anything except actually walking on them.
There are 4 million people in Hanoi and 2 million motorbikes and it seems at least a million of them are on the road at any given time. I swear it seems people are just zipping around all day and all night for no particular reason since I don't believe I saw anyone actually stopping and getting off of their motorbikes. And while the motorbike has replaced the bicycle on the streets, traffic regulations haven't adapted to the change. No stoplights or signs at intersections or pedestrian crossings may have been fine when all you had to do was dodge a granny on a bicycle, but put the old bitty on a 60 mph torpedo then multiply that number by 10 bazillion and...hahahaha...we have a new Olympic sport here, folks. Unfortunately I never did take any photos of me crossing the street the first time, probably because I was laughing my head off and crapping my pants all at once. By the end of our stay in Hanoi, though, I have to say, I definitely got the knack and, you know, a little buzzed by dodging motorbikes. If you're wondering, here are the rules for crossing the streets in Hanoi:
1. Walk slowly.
2. Never stop walking. Walk more slowly if necessary but...never...stop.
3. Keep your eyes on the closest oncoming vehicle.
4. Never step back.
5. Show no fear.
6. NEVER STOP! I can't stress this enough. I saw one tourist frozen in the middle of the street for two minutes providing some good entertainment for the locals until someone ran out to get her.
I was told that the problem would be doubled in Saigon. However, maybe I became proficient and cocky enough at the skill that by the time we were dodging traffic in Saigon, I never got the same thrill as walking across the road in Hanoi.
2. Never stop walking. Walk more slowly if necessary but...never...stop.
3. Keep your eyes on the closest oncoming vehicle.
4. Never step back.
5. Show no fear.
6. NEVER STOP! I can't stress this enough. I saw one tourist frozen in the middle of the street for two minutes providing some good entertainment for the locals until someone ran out to get her.
I was told that the problem would be doubled in Saigon. However, maybe I became proficient and cocky enough at the skill that by the time we were dodging traffic in Saigon, I never got the same thrill as walking across the road in Hanoi.
